operation angler

[wunmanband]

It was 2300 hours, and my small squad of guerrilla bad asses were in the last stand against the larger force, known as "the red team". The air was clouded with the usual jungle sounds of screaming howler monkeys and snoring giraffes. I looked at my team and said "Boys, we might not get out of this one un-welted. It was an honor fighting with you. Also, my dad will be here in like ten minutes with the pizzas." They nodded, and i knew in my heart that they understood. Tyler, the D.M. stood up, and said, "but captain, red team is going to be here any second!" I stood there nobly as patriotic music started playing in the background, and the camera angle panned down and caught my silhouette against the moon. "not on my watch." I stated heroically. "R.A.A.K. on three!" I yelled. "one, two, three, R.A.A.K.!" The whole team was cheering and then I told them that somebody had to draw the team from their encampment. After a few precious moments of silence I told them I would do it. Slowly I sneaked across the bridge and up the right side of the field. I could see them on the very edge, drawn closer by the rest of my team's light sticks. I flipped mine, so it was on my back. My teammates behind me could see me, whilst the enemy could not. I was in my element. Most people believe that there is no lone wolf role in airsoft, but I beg to differ. Sometimes, the most important role is that of the lone wolf. The lone wolf role can be utilized as bait, a distraction, or sometimes he can pull a "dick marcinko" and just totally rape ass. The latter was my job. Slowly, I went up to midfield, and placed a flashlight in the "V" of a tree. There was six or seven enemy troops advancing up the left of the field, totally unaware of my presence. I clicked on the light, and darted away silently. Instantly, they all looked at the light, and opened fire. As they were shooting, I used this opportunity to circle around to their flank. Once they moved close enough to secure the light, they realized it was a set up. Right at that moment, The 3 other members of R.A.A.K. started laying down buckets of plastic. The red team dove for cover, and started returning fire. I slowly started advancing to the man on the far left, who was staggered behind the rest of his team. Knife kill. I then Opened up on full auto and let out my best war cry and mowed down the other six players. I was hailed a hero, and was awarded high fives and compliments. Then we had some pizza. Cause i'm a baller.
THE END

[Kiki]

I'll be honest, this isn't much of a "Tale of Valor". It's more of a "Short Story of a Backyard War". While you're not going against any rules, it's not exactly what this section is for. If you do read the rules post, Munin says "Try to make your story interesting. Use adjectives well and put a little dramatic tension into it". It just makes a story into a good tale. If you go through and read some of the other good Tales of Valor posts, you'll see they're multiple paragraphs long, even if they only span a few minutes of actual gameplay.

What I'm trying to say is that it's all in the writing. Your story is pretty bland and too straightforward. I would suggest taking more than just a few minutes and re-write it. It's a good start, but it needs more time and thought put into it to make it a good Tale.

[Relarz]

Those are suggestions, man. This section is pretty much just to brag anyway, some of us are just more artistic than others. Let sleeping dogs lie.

[Thundernuts Cockpunch]

Cool story bro. I'm pretty baller too. We should hang out sometime and shoot each other in the face point blank until one of us says stop to prove who the bigger baller is.

[wunmanband]

i was kind of in a rush when i wrote this one. i will definitely re-write it.

[Knief]

wunmanband,

I'm going to give you a warning for failing to capitalize a single letter in your last two posts. Please read up on our grammar and other rules and follow them in future. Thanks.

[wunmanband]

YES SIR.

[fuzzywolly]

Little things like that do not matter much wunmanband. Everyone makes mistakes but you are making many of them, and on purpose, which is against the rules. Also, you triple posted, which is also against the rules.

You will also be most likely banned for being a total ass to a great moderator, who is just trying to keep this forum clean.

[wunmanband]

Oh my lordy. Not in the sense that I'm probably going to be banned, oh my lordy in the sense that I feel like an ass, and for that, I humbly apologize. Do what you must, and do justice swiftly.

[Knief]

It's cool man, just try to follow the rules in the future.

[Dahm]

Haha, why exactly do you know what the sound of a snoring giraffe is...? It's interesting how you plotted it out like you were being filmed in a movie. You should talk to MS-ARC, he's been in a movie or two now!

[scottyhumps]

I'm not gonna lie, I'm diggin' the tone of the story. I've always been a sucker for stories that break the fourth wall and that looks like the entire point of the story. It's obvious you're playing with how seriously some people take airsoft, especially those backyard COD kids. It looks like you have a general idea of your writing voice, but still could take some practice to hone it. Everyone who's dogging on your mechanics and grammar bring up a valid point. I think if you get some more practice writing you could have even better story. If you ever write anything else I"ll be sure to look at it.